Gameday: Canucks v Oilers (Round One... Fight!)

The 'Nucks are in town and word around the Northwest Division is that it is on. They're missing Sami Salo, we're missing Shelly. They're missing Daniel Sedin, we're missing Ales Hemsky¹. So both teams are out their top D-man and their top goal scorer--

Wait. What? Hemmer isn't our top scorer? Well then who is?



Dustin. Penner.

Who woulda thunk it? I'll tell ya who thunk it. Nobody thunk it! Not one person thunk that DP would be our top scorer this year, least of all any schmuck at this blog.

But lo and behold, there he is: tied for 5th in the league in goals (neck-and-neck with certain people).

Speaking of surprising point-getters, one Mr. Comrie is looking like a terrific acquisition. Of more concern is that he finally trotted out his arm candy at RX1.



While The Duff seems genuinely pleased for her beau, one cannot help but notice that glint of hardened steel in her tastefully shadowed eyes. What the picture doesn't show is that gaze is leveled at Khabibulin's wife. I'd keep my head up if I were you, devochka, you are on thin ice around these parts.

On the topic of soft er... hands, Comrie's former teammate Georges Laraque is in a bit of trouble himself since the internet was set aflame by this little video:



Oh, Georges. I'm sure the big man had some inkling of what the makers of Octane 7.0 were going to do with the footage of him making an ass of himself amidst scantily-clad Sexoteque employees, but I doubt the poor guy knew he was going to get edited into a Satisfaction/Call On Me ripoff. He released a statement saying as much and, nearly a week later, it seems the world's most terrifying vegan is going to get off with a bit of "Aw shucks" and a tsk-tsk from NHLHQ (as he should, the money went to charity for goodness sake).

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, we have to push the curves of the Octane Girls out of our minds and focus on the hard edge necessary to steal our second divisional win from the claws of Lulu & Company. Here's hoping the injury bug is biting them harder than us.

¹Apparently Staios is out with the same flu bug. Wuh-oh.